WavesToSound (9:30:32 PM) : GRETA VAN SUSTRAN IS NATALLIE HALLAWAY'ING!!!!!!!!
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:30:43 PM) : OH MY GOD
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:30:51 PM) : FO SHIZ?
WavesToSound (9:31:00 PM) : FO FUCKING SHIZZ
WavesToSound (9:31:10 PM) : awww, it ended
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:31:13 PM) : It's --- damn
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:31:20 PM) : don't worry, she'll return
WavesToSound (9:31:27 PM) : she always returns.
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:31:41 PM) : ... this is so going in my profile.
WavesToSound (9:31:45 PM) : hahaha
WavesToSound (9:31:56 PM) : we make her sound like she's a reoccuring illness
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:32:03 PM) : or a villian
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:32:11 PM) : like, The Green Goblin
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:32:13 PM) : or something
WavesToSound (9:32:19 PM) : my television has come down with a serious case of Greta Van Sustran.
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:32:29 PM) : ROFL!
WavesToSound (9:32:33 PM) : it always returns.
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:33:37 PM) : check mah buddy info
WavesToSound (9:33:39 PM) : it needs some Gretanti-biotics
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:33:56 PM) : okay, this is getting taken too far
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:33:59 PM) : ... but I like it
WavesToSound (9:34:03 PM) : or just change the channel and give your television of dose of MSNBC
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:34:29 PM) : Put a few botox injections into your cable
(9:38:22 PM) : just like she always does
WavesToSound (9:37:05 PM) : SHE"S ON AGAIN
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:37:17 PM) : I TOLD YOU SHE'D RETURN!
WavesToSound (9:37:31 PM) : SHE'S GIVING A TWOFER WITH A TASTE OF SCOTT PETERSON
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:37:45 PM) : OH GOD! SAY IT ISN'T TRUE!
WavesToSound (9:37:55 PM) : IT IS
WavesToSound (9:38:00 PM) : awwww, it ended
MyHardcoreWasabi (9:38:08 PM) : but she'll return
WavesToSound- Mood:
Roflmao - Music:Elvis
Sinesith (11:38:20 PM) : but, you know what would suck? To be a centipede taur
Sinesith (11:38:25 PM) : you'd spend SO much money on shoes
Hahahaha
Hahahaha
what more do you need in life?
- Mood:
ecstatic
Why am I talking about this? It's boring, I'm boring. I need to change, a lot.
But I'm excited, I'll be meeting Josh tomorow (NOT Josh June) and I'm really psyched cause I got my hair done today and it looks sooooo good.
I'm glad I left before everything went "BOOM" last night, because for the time that I was there, I really enjoyed myself. I felt like I was cool with everyone who was there, like none of us secretley hated eachother, and it felt so stress-free. I mean, I'm sure there are people who hate me in secret, but I don't really care to know. I'm sure the one person there who did hate me was Brenda, but it doesn't really bother me, we've drifted apart, I've tried to be polite to her, but what can you do? I guess we went from being decent friends to just tolerating eachother, but those things just happen I guess.
Apparantly after I left everyone was pissed at eachother and all this drama that doesn't involve me happened, and now I know that I left for a reason. I'm just too happy right now to let anything petty bring me down.
Happy about all my college friends being home
Happy about meeting a boy that respects me and likes me and doesn't lead me on
Happy about the show coming up
Happy about break
Happy about my personal life coming out of this agonizing phase
Now I can focus on getting things done and being there for my friends when they need me (and actually wanting to be there). This is the healing process I've been waiting for. I'm not just content or pleased, I am happy and excited, I have so much to look forward to. It feels great. I wanna be there for everyone and help them when they need me. I want to be selfless, I want to see everyone else in a good place. But everyone seems to be in a bad place right now. Come to me, ask for my help, call me, I want to make you happy.
- Mood: cheerful
- Music:Imogen Heap
- Location:Brother's Room
- Music:Metallica
I'm gonna start writing a book.
And probably post the chapters up here.
Aside from that? Nothing too spectacular. I can't go out tonight because my mom feels like pissing me off, and I'm bored as shitglue stuck to a ceiling in a school cafeteria(?).
I really love life. But I really hate it..... that makes sense, trust me.
Anyways, I feel kind of aggitated, so I'm gonna go eat some pickles.
Nothin' like some food to hold you over until you can go out with your friends. Don't be surprised if I gain 100 pounds from this awful thing called "groundment".
- Mood:
blah
So, it's been a while since Shuffle died, and I haven't really been interested in looking at other horses.
But, there was this one, and my mom just felt like we had to check him out.
So we go, and almost right away, I have that feeling.
His personality reminds me of Shuffle without the excessive nervousness, and he's a good gated ride.
So, after falling in love, getting signs all over the place, and talking with my dad.... we're getting him, he's coming tuesday.
I couldn't tell you how excited I am.
- Mood:
giddy
I basically hugged him.
8D
- Mood: giddy
XP!!!!!!!!
Chamber rehearsal was pretty fly for a white guy.
- Location:Brother's Room
- Mood:
calm - Music:FL studio
...
...
...
...
YUP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*dances*
Brandon and Bilie made Chamber AND Camarata, I'm so happy for them, especially Brandon since he's just starting to break into the scene.
I feel soooo bad for Krista, she didn't make it... like I knew she wasn't, but still.
Like, after 8th period I practically ran to the list. I was about to that area where "I" hall is, and I see Emily approach and she smiles, and immediately I was like "HOLY WOAH!!!!!!!!"
Life is good.
- Location:Tom's room
- Mood:
bouncy - Music:Limp Bizkit
Waves To Sound: my feet hurt
MyHardcoreWasabi: beautiful
Waves To Sound: *steps on floor* ...ow
MyHardcoreWasabi: lollerskates
Waves To Sound: *takes another step* ....ow
Waves To Sound: i should wear some lollerskates
MyHardcoreWasabi: LOLLERSKATES
MyHardcoreWasabi: you witty mother fucker
Waves To Sound: you lesbian mother fucker
MyHardcoreWasabi: lol!
MyHardcoreWasabi: wth?
Waves To Sound: you know you want it
Waves To Sound: "pushes hot 'Muther' in your face"
MyHardcoreWasabi: 8(
MyHardcoreWasabi: wow
MyHardcoreWasabi: just wow
Waves To Sound: you know you want it
Waves To Sound: *rapes*
MyHardcoreWasabi: dude!
MyHardcoreWasabi: *punches*
Waves To Sound: *rapes*
MyHardcoreWasabi: *uses my newly updated work out tape moves to whup your theatrical ass*
Waves To Sound: *punches*
Waves To Sound: *hard*
MyHardcoreWasabi: *becomes batman and chucks non supernatural gas bombs at you to insult your theories and beliefs on superheroes*
Waves To Sound: *web slings in your face, ties you up (with webs), hangs you from the cieling upside down and uses you as a punching bag for even bringing up Batman*
Waves To Sound: ...
MyHardcoreWasabi: *uses my batman razor thingies to slash through your web and hops in my radical bat mobile to escape*
MyHardcoreWasabi: *batman theme music*
Waves To Sound: *web slings bat-mobile and pulls back (with actual super-powers*. then webs you up in a web cacoon and rolls you down a hill into a lake filled with paronnas. then takes you're bones and cremates them (with superpowers)*
Waves To Sound: ****
MyHardcoreWasabi: ...*becomes the hulk and punches the shit out of you*
Waves To Sound: dude
Waves To Sound: you can't do that
MyHardcoreWasabi: lol
Waves To Sound: you were batman
MyHardcoreWasabi: oh yes I can
MyHardcoreWasabi: well I'm also magic
Waves To Sound: they are from completely different worlds of comic books
MyHardcoreWasabi: *pisses on your spiderish face*
Waves To Sound: batman is dc and hulk is marvel
Waves To Sound: is doesn't work
Waves To Sound: they aren't even in the same country
MyHardcoreWasabi: you what doesn't work *farts on you* that
MyHardcoreWasabi: *vanishes*
MyHardcoreWasabi: okay I think I may go to bed now
Waves To Sound: if that even made sense, that would be lame
MyHardcoreWasabi: lollerskates
need I say more?
need I say more?
- Location:Brother's Room
- Mood:
content - Music:IMogen Heap
If someone asked you to help them cheat on a test, would you?
This one is cake.
Depending on my mood, who they are, and their discretion, I’d probably ignore them
What one song best describes you?
How could I possibly know that?
I’d need a sound track
If you were a super hero, who would you be?
There are no famous super heroes that can relate to me
…do my own super heroes count...?
If so, then Malado Man, he is like me but not because blah blah blah
The super hero question really got my noggin joggin. I’m beginning to realize that I’m not as bad a person as I thought, and yet not quite good either. It depends on who you are. If you’re my mom coming home from long days of work to a lazy good for nothing daughter, then I’m pretty much a bad person… or as she bluntly stated in the midst of an argument, an “insolent little child.” … but… if you are a friend on the verge of pointless combustion that can’t be backed by reason… I’m probably the devil in disguise as an angel. I’ll warp my selfishness into something it’s not.
I’m always selfish when it comes to my family, the people who I love the most but for some reason spite on the inside. Generally speaking, I’m not a very good daughter; in fact I’m rather sullen, especially towards my father. In truth I’d rather crawl into bed and nap than go to dinner with him. I know it sounds terrible, but I’m a terrible person, we all are. But we aren’t at the same time; we’re so wholesome we can’t take it.
The human mind is a fickle thing.
If you could choose how you wanted to die, how would it be?
Oh boy, he threw a whammy, the question of questions, the mind-challenger of mind-challengers.
I wouldn’t choose, I’d be cheating myself out of mystery
In truth, that last question was the easiest to answer, because I’ve thought about it a helluva lot more than the other two questions, and I’ve gotten a good idea about my feelings towards it.
It is, as Coach G. said, the ultimate unknown… and I’d think I’d like to keep it that way.
It’s not that Rachel Elaina Lawhorn doesn’t fear death; she just doesn’t daunt on it or wish on ways she’d like to die.
That’s just not how I roll.
“Her wilting heart sank to the bottom of the ocean... the ocean of cold lies that people tell themselves, the ocean of lost causes, of broken and mocked dreams, of shattered chests and gushing hearts, of crying girls and guys who think with their dicks, of solemn victims who got kicked out of their dark corners, of those who live perfect but imperfect lives, of those who have been kidding themselves, of fools who gave their love to demons in disguise, of manifesting hatred that turned to unreciprocated love which dreams by an exploding sunset or mopes during a poignant and emotional twilight; bitter sweet dusk stabbed with mountain peaks and flattered by a collection of sand, where the oceans sorrowful waters dampen the grains. It's really beautiful, if only she could see it from the happy distant safe place. The view is like a painting... but it was too late, her wilting heart sank to the bottom of the ocean."
- Location:Room
- Mood: listless
- Music:Time After Time
I've realized that I can be a really REALLY mean person.
I'm making an oath to myself to try and be as nice as possible.
I don't mean to hurt people, it's just that when there is a pending wave of raw emotion coming, they stand there with surf boards thinking they can ride it.
She did a pretty good job of riding this one, at least she handled my bitterness pretty well.
I'm going to try and direct my flames to people who really deserve it, like Krista. Just stay out of my line of fire if you aren't meant to be there. Guaranteed you'll get burned if you tread, I can get vicious.
I think I have a tendancy of taking people in circles, I give them no fare warning before exploding. I'm like a silent bomb.
- Location:your mom
- Mood:
guilty - Music:none
I got out of bed really early because I had terrible stomach cramps.
I feel unusual because my antidepressants are making me hairy.
I'm so happy. I just found out that I have been accepted into Harvard. And Yale. I don't know which to choose... oh, why is life so hard sometimes?
Last night I had to masturbate twenty times. I'm so horny. Click here to see my website.
I want to tell the world that I'm gay.
I am sharpening my knives before I go to work today, because I'm going to cut out Robert's heart and feed it to him for losing my mail.
Today, I got a digital camera! Yes! Here's some photos of my girlfriend in the nude (but don't tell her that I've posted them here - she'll kill me! Har har.)
I want to say thanks to the world for absolutely fucking nothing! You all suck. I feel so alone, no one ever reads this journal, or even comments to let me know that I'm not suffering alone. It's cold here, and I want to die, but I cannot figure out how many of you to take with me when I go.
I went to the doctor yesterday, and he said I have a terrible skin disease which prevents me from coming into contact with other human beings. And bipolar disorder.
You should all do this quiz! It's amazingly accurate. You just put in your name and birthday, and it will tell you you're a moron.
..... fuuuuuuuuuuucccccccccckkkkkkk mmmmmmmmeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
That's enough for now. But I'll leave you with some naked photos of myself. (Not safe for work - teehee).
<small>Created with the <a href="http://rumandmonkey.com/widgets/to
- Location:face
- Mood: exanimate
- Music:face
I’ve realized recently just how hard it is for a piece of literature to captivate me. That it takes raw emotion, realistic displays, and impeccable similes to catch my attention.
I’ve decided to devote my summer to what I really love doing. Although there will be ugly interruptions, I’m sure… I’ll save the ache and let it pour out into a scrap of paper, a fresh document on Microsoft Word, a pitiful journal entry.
Who knows where these tedious days ahead may take me, I have no promise of social life this summer. My parents question my keenness of responsibility. But I am nothing more than a girl looking for a life. I’m basically harmless; sitting up in my room, strumming thick metal strings and singing to a soul-twisting song, letting my fingers press buttons with the musical sound of literature’s progress, lying in bed and sleeping off my stolen hours of sleep. Groundment has destroyed my sense of normal; has taken it and bashed its barrier like a Mongolian cursing the Great Wall of China with warrior paint splattered on his angry face. Tell me, what kind of girl do you think I am? Do I seem like the type to do pot in an alley by the Last Drop Coffee Shop? Do I seem like the type to have ravenous sex with multiple partners? Do I seem like the type to go up to another girl and say “bitch let’s go”, just cause I can?
All answers should have been no, either that or you don’t know me very well. At least if we are talking seriously.
I am a dead beat; I am a nobody without social interaction. And taking it away from me is a sin in the sense of life’s quality. I have done nothing to deserve not being trusted. I should be able to go to promising parties, I should be able to get out and live my life. I have earned it god damnit, and any douche bag who wants to steal what I deserve from me has got another thing coming.
If I am going to be sitting in my house all summer, you bet I’m going to fuck around. I will sneak out and be as bad as my parents assume me to be. You want to play that way? Fine, I’ll play right back.
Hopefully I am not expected to dick around all summer, but I do have faith in that with enough haggling, I can convince my mother to let me be free; to let me enjoy my life while I am young; to let me grow up.
Aside from summer’s expectations:
Today I jammed with Drew and Eric Plankey. I had a good time with the exception that Drew has a hard time playing with other people, and just solos the whole time. It’s a jam, not a one man show. There was one little jam with just me and Plankey that I really liked, it was softer and not like any of that “fuck yeah rock hard” stuff. I want to do it in that same key again, and record it.
Tomorrow is my Language Arts final. I don’t really care. All I need to do is study vocab, which I’m pretty sure won’t matter anyway. Even if you failed that part of the final, Brandon told me that the other parts are easy, and that you’d probably get a C if you just bull shitted the vocab part.
- Location:My Room
- Mood:
contemplative - Music:Stone Sour
Before class starts: Plankey makes me laugh, I'm seriously cereal.
Period one: ew?
Period two: Rosenblatt makes me want to beat someone with an obese stick. Apparantly she "knows her books", and used feeling "your car tire after a long trip" as an example for energy... cause everyone totally does that.
Period three: ew?
Period four: I think Rich Vega is into me... so does Allie. I'm not into him back so don't worry, that just wouldn't work AT ALL (ew).
Period five: Strings was okay?
Period six: I couldn't laugh cause it hurt and everyone was making me laugh, IT HURRRRRRT SO FUCKING BAD! I wanted to beat the crap out of brandon, that skeevy latino bastard.
Period seven: Drew made me laugh the whole frellin' period, why is it that on the funniest day of my life it hurts to laugh? Irony can be a bitch.
Period eight: chilled with Brenda and Janyce, and we bitched about how masuk tries to be healthy, and it just doesn't make sense... at all.
After school: NUTTIN.
Recap of the past few days:
Yesterday: BORING! Brandon wasn't there and it made my day... incomplete
Sunday: PF (Poopy Funeral), philosophy on foolishness
Saturday: Farm, me and audrey practiced Hallelujah and it sounded soo pretty. And we both got horny and talked about it, because we're that close.
Friday: one word... Last Drop... wait... thats two words.... But "Ashton Kutcher" was there, and he hit on Cheyenne.
Not much else to say, peace out?
- Location:Room
- Mood: content
- Music:Goo Goo Dolls
Before Class: meh
Period one (Waricha): So we talked about shit today, and apparanty Katie got suspended for calling Mrs. Blake a bitch and making her CRY. Right before we left Katie said "Why do you always look so fucking cute? Its annoying." That boosted my self esteem. When we were walking we both discussed how much we miss Mrs. Bloom's humorous insolence. I keep expecting her to just like, walk in the class room in the middle of period one and be all like "JUST KIDDING!"
Period two (Rosenblatt): OH boy. So, Bilie, Brandon, and I got in this BIG tissy fit about brenda's party. Rosenblatt wasn't here, and our sub was fucking scary, and made me laugh, he had no sense of personal space at all. I was like "wow back up like, a foot." After the period ended Bilie basically just apologized. We always make-up instantly. And the party is still going down how it was supposed to.
Period three (Sullivan/Shea): Ew
Period four (Castile): Me and brandon were going to go to Bilie's health class and pretend to be German exchange students, but the substitute for Pagel was Ms. Adam's (EW). She knows who we are, so we just went to the cafe and stuff. Both Emma and Daniel misunderstood Brandon when he said Ms. Waricha's name; "Warship" and "Horseshit."
Period five (Homan): We were in the band room today... woot?
Period six (Lunch): Brandon flossed his teeth mid lunch.... weirdo
Period seven (Toth/Halkovic): We have the coolest project for Toth. We have to make myspace's for the Romeo and Juliet characters. I'm not sure who I want to do, Mercutio maybe? I kind of wanted to do Juliet as well, even if it seems cliche.
Period eight (O'conner): O'conner let me go to the cafe as usual, The usual happened, and brandon raped me with "horse bites" again.
So like, I wanna dress up one of my friends all juliety and take a pic of them for my "Shakspace" [Myspace(that was corny I know)] I don't know who to do though, garrrrrr.
So I pretty much hate Ms. Adams for ruining my weekend, please go drown in the pool, and if not, please be forced to stay in the pool until you are pruned and chlorined to death. Go teach yourself elaborate swimming techniques, I personally don't need them to stay alive... I float if you will. Pool should only be for people who really can't swim and would die if they got in water. This is such a waste of my life. I could be doing something else with that, like an elective or something.
So because I refuse to get in my bathing suit in front of a bunch of fellow students and feel uncomfortable in a big tub of water that gives pool class an excuse, I am grounded. I could just be smart and go along with it for the sake of my weekends and dignified attitude towards teachers, but fuck that. I don't feel like changing, jumping in water, and changing again.I hate going home and smelling the chlorine on me, plus it makes my hair sticky and annoying so I have to wash it like a maniac. Fuck you pool, FUCK YOU.
There were so many things I could have done this weekend. Go with audrey to die her hair, have Emily and Jenny come over, go to last drop, hang out with britt, watch the O.C. with brandon. Instead I'm stuck here... again, because of Ms. Adams. I think I'll go do crazy make-up and photography to kill the time. Later....
- Location:My room
- Mood: bored
- Music:Regina Spektor
Go look at brandon's most recent journal entry.... If you know Mrs. Bloom you will laugh, alot.
Morning: Got up, dressed crappy, ate apple jacks, fucked with the face, braided my hair. Left....
Before class: the usual... except for dollars in coins (brandon knows)
Period one (Waricha): We watched shit on Ivan the Terrible
Period two (Rosenblatt): Ew
Period three (Sullivan/Shea): Ew
Period four (Castile): Ew
Period five (Gangi): worked on "Humming Chorus", "That Garden Song Thing", "Mens Piece", "Womans Piece". Billy Kenny STILL has supposed "Larengetis" (Laryngitis). What a fag....
Period six (Lunch): Brandon raped me?
Period seven (Toth/Halkovic): So I pretty much drew Queen Mab.
Period eight (Math Lab): Totally didn't go because my teacher was no where in sight, so I went to the cafe.
After school: NOTHING... except a fight with my mom...
I feel sick from an overdose on Billy Kenny, Cappucino, 100 Grand bars. I have such a headache, and I'm so tired...
Ellen said jess can't pull off skinny pants, but she can. What a bitch.
I feel like punching someone.
Wow.
I'm trying to think of how to literate whats going on in my head, i'm having a hard time. Sorry, I might make another entry later If I figure things out...
- Location:My Room
- Mood:
sick - Music:Regina Spektor
Your Life: The Soundtrack
Opening credits- Just For Now ~ Imogen Heap
Waking Up- Whats My Age Again~ Blink 182
Average Day- Plastic~Reveille (or) Lady~ Regina Spektor
First Date- First Date~ Blink 182
Falling In Love- Fidelity~ Regina Spektor (or) Dosed~ Red Hot Chili Peppers
Love Scene- All Around Me~ Flyleaf (or) Animals~Nickelback
Fight Scene- Bodies~ Drowning Pool (or) Holier Than Thou ~ Metallica
Breaking Up- Shut Up~ Black Eyed Peas (or) Love~Strapping Young Lad
Getting Back Together- Walk The Line~ Johnny Cash
Secret Love- Notice~Audrey Feigin
Life's Okay- We Fly High ~ Jim Jones
Mental Breakdown- I'm So Sick ~ Flyleaf
Driving- Bat Country ~ Avenged Sevenfold
Learning a Lesson- What It's Like ~ Everlast
Deep Thought- Wasteland~10 Years (or) Chasing Cars~ Snow Patrol
Flashback- Boston~ Augustana
Partying- Hands Up~ Black Eyed Peas
Happy Dance- Beat it ~ Michael Jackson
Regretting- Otherside~ Red Hot Chili Peppers
Long Night Alone- Samson~ Regina Spektor
Death Scene- Halleluja~Jeff Buckley (acopella)
Closing Credits- Down to the River to Pray
- Location:My Room
- Music:We Fly High ~ Jim Jones
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renegaderachel- renegaderachel
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